#753: No, THIS Is Just To Say

You sonofabitch, now what am I supposed to eat for breakfast? There’s nothing else in the fridge. I might have forgiven you if you had thought to stop by Trader Joe’s for some eggs, or a muffin, or maybe even a few more plums, you know, the delicious, sweet, and cold kind. But no, you couldn’t be bothered with that. This is just to say that I’ve had it up to here with your shortsightedness and your selfishness. You think a cute little poem on the refrigerator makes it all better? I’m famished. At least there’s some goddamn coffee. And it appears there’s still a little creamer left. So I’m just gonna sit here sipping and stewing, but be warned: next time you bring home some special piece of produce, don’t you even think about saving it for breakfast. It’s mine, sucker.